Really, there are so many times while reading some of the adds that "Dominants" post that make me wonder what the hell leads them to believe they are one. Has that happened to you too? Welcome then, take a sit and grab a cookie. We will be here forever if we wait for this to stop.
The worst thing is that they actually expect a reply and bump the shittiest adds I've ever read.
"If you're a sub or slave kik me at xyz and say Yes, Sir". REALLY?! What in the actual fuck? Why would anyone call you Sir, Master or Owner? What the fuck have you done to deserve that title right from the very 1st message? How do you expect anyone to submit to you when they don't know you from a can of paint? How can you demand obedience when you don't give a flying fuck about trust and building that? The ignorance is strong in these ones.
Want to spark actual interest? They homie, take a sit and if I'm about to tell you bores the ever living shit out of you... Then dude, you ain't a Dom... You're someone that just uses a title to jack off to someone.
If you truly want a dynamic, then you need to catch someone's attention. How? Well, who are you? What do we have in common besides BDSM? What do you do for fun that we can talk about? What are your kinks, dislikes, limits? How long have you been into BDSM? What experience do you have? Will you actually care for your sub? How much availability do you have to dedicate to your sub? what time zone are you? How much effort are you willing to make this work out? Will you care about me outside of the dynamic? Will you ask how the sub's day was? And why should you disclose all of that info? Well... People need to know something to see if they'll be a good fit, what things in common they have to build on those to create a bond, a bond that will lead to trust, trust that will lead a submissive to trust their submission to you. Knowing that you're there for them. That you don't just care about their bodies but you care about the whole package, the person.
You think Dominance is just giving tasks and orders? You need to know the person you're controlling. How their mind works, how their heart feels, how something can trigger a negative emotion and they shut down. Is about letting your sub know their submission is appreciated and valued and never taken for granted. They give you control not only of their bodies, they give you control of their minds. Do you know what effect a Dominant has in a submissive's life? If you have no clue, then look for a mentor that can give you a hint before posting an add and then you ben clueless on what to do and giving someone the shittiest taste of BDSM and give REAL Dominants a bad rep.
If you're here to find someone to jerk off to, at least be honest and just say that. You might find someone who is into exposure and wants exactly what you're offering. But please don't use and give yourself a title when you don't even know what it means and entails. Always be honest with telling people what you're actually seeking, don't lie, there's no reason to.
Think not only about you but also about others, what if you find yourself with a sub that dies to please you but you have no clue on how to cae for them and then you poof and come up wit a shitty excuse to end things, have you thought how can that affect a person? Of course it hasn't crossed your mind, start now and don't leave anyone wondering is their submission wasn't enough for you, if their feelings for you were not enough, if they did something wrong that made you disappear.. You're not the one who would question themselves and if they are good enough for someone else.
You're asking someone to surrender themselves to you with the certainty that if they fall, you'll be there to catch them and help them up and build something TOGETHER. If that's not what you're after, then please, please, please STOP using a title that doesn't fit you nor belongs to you. A title that can be given to you by someone, and that someone is a sub. A title they'll give you when they feel one thing with you, BELONGING which takes time to feel. So next time you post an add, keep in mind that you're not just asking something simple out of someone when you look for a sub.
The worst thing is that they actually expect a reply and bump the shittiest adds I've ever read.
"If you're a sub or slave kik me at xyz and say Yes, Sir". REALLY?! What in the actual fuck? Why would anyone call you Sir, Master or Owner? What the fuck have you done to deserve that title right from the very 1st message? How do you expect anyone to submit to you when they don't know you from a can of paint? How can you demand obedience when you don't give a flying fuck about trust and building that? The ignorance is strong in these ones.
Want to spark actual interest? They homie, take a sit and if I'm about to tell you bores the ever living shit out of you... Then dude, you ain't a Dom... You're someone that just uses a title to jack off to someone.
If you truly want a dynamic, then you need to catch someone's attention. How? Well, who are you? What do we have in common besides BDSM? What do you do for fun that we can talk about? What are your kinks, dislikes, limits? How long have you been into BDSM? What experience do you have? Will you actually care for your sub? How much availability do you have to dedicate to your sub? what time zone are you? How much effort are you willing to make this work out? Will you care about me outside of the dynamic? Will you ask how the sub's day was? And why should you disclose all of that info? Well... People need to know something to see if they'll be a good fit, what things in common they have to build on those to create a bond, a bond that will lead to trust, trust that will lead a submissive to trust their submission to you. Knowing that you're there for them. That you don't just care about their bodies but you care about the whole package, the person.
You think Dominance is just giving tasks and orders? You need to know the person you're controlling. How their mind works, how their heart feels, how something can trigger a negative emotion and they shut down. Is about letting your sub know their submission is appreciated and valued and never taken for granted. They give you control not only of their bodies, they give you control of their minds. Do you know what effect a Dominant has in a submissive's life? If you have no clue, then look for a mentor that can give you a hint before posting an add and then you ben clueless on what to do and giving someone the shittiest taste of BDSM and give REAL Dominants a bad rep.
If you're here to find someone to jerk off to, at least be honest and just say that. You might find someone who is into exposure and wants exactly what you're offering. But please don't use and give yourself a title when you don't even know what it means and entails. Always be honest with telling people what you're actually seeking, don't lie, there's no reason to.
Think not only about you but also about others, what if you find yourself with a sub that dies to please you but you have no clue on how to cae for them and then you poof and come up wit a shitty excuse to end things, have you thought how can that affect a person? Of course it hasn't crossed your mind, start now and don't leave anyone wondering is their submission wasn't enough for you, if their feelings for you were not enough, if they did something wrong that made you disappear.. You're not the one who would question themselves and if they are good enough for someone else.
You're asking someone to surrender themselves to you with the certainty that if they fall, you'll be there to catch them and help them up and build something TOGETHER. If that's not what you're after, then please, please, please STOP using a title that doesn't fit you nor belongs to you. A title that can be given to you by someone, and that someone is a sub. A title they'll give you when they feel one thing with you, BELONGING which takes time to feel. So next time you post an add, keep in mind that you're not just asking something simple out of someone when you look for a sub.
