Up until 2017 I considered myself 100% straight and 90% dominant.
I consumed SO MUCH female bondage and BDSM porn, "slutwear" fetish and voyeur/nude in public/ENF content... I was aware of men cross dressing and sissy fetish but never deep dived into it.
One day at work (while I was having something of a crisis) I decided I had to punish myself by cross dressing and spending so much time for X number of work uncompleted by a certain self-imposed deadline... And suddenly a whole new side of myself opened up.
Since then my interest in and collection of sissy/feminisation porn has grown massively... To the point where I now get more turned on by that than I do the traditional porn I spent my 20's and most of my 30's jacking off to... I'm not sure if it's age related or porn addiction but I'm also struggling to be erect with my very vanilla wife the past couple of years... I can get it up but I struggle to keep it, and I find my mind wandering more and more to situations where I'm feminised rather than thinking sexy things about her... She's never been horny often and it's even less so now she's going through age-related changes as her menstrual cycles are starting to wind down and becoming completely erratic.
The sensible thing to do would be to quit porn (and sell the femme outfits hidden at the back of my wardrobe) but I would always rather fuck myself up even more...
I'm trying to get the hang of self-denial but I can never get edging right and while I'm alone working from home, I often find myself distracted with Kinktalk or porn and desperate to cum...
So I came up with a system to make things worse for myself.
Now before I start to masturbate, I have to flip a coin.
Heads three times in a row and I can choose female bondage porn, but just a single tails dooms me to having to look at something more open minded...
Then I have to flip again; heads and I get to at least jack off to femdom porn. Tails and it's yet another flip.
Heads this time earns me sissy-on-sissy porn, while tails means I'm a complete faggot and have to find porn of a sissy being used and abused by a real man...
Four days in and I haven't seen any female porn since I started which is both concerning and incredibly arousing
I consumed SO MUCH female bondage and BDSM porn, "slutwear" fetish and voyeur/nude in public/ENF content... I was aware of men cross dressing and sissy fetish but never deep dived into it.
One day at work (while I was having something of a crisis) I decided I had to punish myself by cross dressing and spending so much time for X number of work uncompleted by a certain self-imposed deadline... And suddenly a whole new side of myself opened up.
Since then my interest in and collection of sissy/feminisation porn has grown massively... To the point where I now get more turned on by that than I do the traditional porn I spent my 20's and most of my 30's jacking off to... I'm not sure if it's age related or porn addiction but I'm also struggling to be erect with my very vanilla wife the past couple of years... I can get it up but I struggle to keep it, and I find my mind wandering more and more to situations where I'm feminised rather than thinking sexy things about her... She's never been horny often and it's even less so now she's going through age-related changes as her menstrual cycles are starting to wind down and becoming completely erratic.
The sensible thing to do would be to quit porn (and sell the femme outfits hidden at the back of my wardrobe) but I would always rather fuck myself up even more...
I'm trying to get the hang of self-denial but I can never get edging right and while I'm alone working from home, I often find myself distracted with Kinktalk or porn and desperate to cum...
So I came up with a system to make things worse for myself.
Now before I start to masturbate, I have to flip a coin.
Heads three times in a row and I can choose female bondage porn, but just a single tails dooms me to having to look at something more open minded...
Then I have to flip again; heads and I get to at least jack off to femdom porn. Tails and it's yet another flip.
Heads this time earns me sissy-on-sissy porn, while tails means I'm a complete faggot and have to find porn of a sissy being used and abused by a real man...
Four days in and I haven't seen any female porn since I started which is both concerning and incredibly arousing
