Advice.. thoughts?

[Beautyandthekink]

I’m a switch, leaning more towards natural sub/slave. I was in a D/s relationship for awhile and was only submissive to them. But I dommed alot of others during that time. Things happened, and I stopped feeling submissive for months,..

fast forward like 6 or more months now. I have still been domming others. I’m finally feeling submissive again but I’m finding it hard to feel submissive with other people. It’s almost like I reverted back to the shy person I was when I first found bdsm.. I have these submissive feelings again but feel almost awkward when trying to be submissive towards someone. I would love some advice or to hear any thoughts on how to push past this

 

[subzzzero]

I’m a switch, leaning more towards natural sub/slave. I was in a D/s relationship for awhile and was only submissive to them. But I dommed alot of others during that time. Things happened, and I stopped feeling submissive for months,..

fast forward like 6 or more months now. I have still been domming others. I’m finally feeling submissive again but I’m finding it hard to feel submissive with other people. It’s almost like I reverted back to the shy person I was when I first found bdsm.. I have these submissive feelings again but feel almost awkward when trying to be submissive towards someone. I would love some advice or to hear any thoughts on how to push past this

maybe look inside to see what it is that’s causing you to feel it’s hard to be sub.
Is it higher expectations now that you’ve been domming?
Does it make you feel weak to sub after being domme for so long?
Do you feel you can’t be both d and s in separate times and enjoy each for its own good qualities?
Look at your prior dominants. Are the current potentials up to that standard now?
Are you considering current subs of yours as a potential dominant ? I know some subs who can’t sub to a guy who is a switch. It’s just a thing for them.

I’d think maybe you feel shy or hard to give in to it all because you’re now having to be vulnerable again. You’re having to find trust in someone to allow you to give up that control again. Being a dominant didn’t rely on you to trust another with your well-being and safety. You were controlling that role yourself and maybe after living that role you’re seeing just how much there is to be managed by a dominant and you are doubting any potential candidates.

I’d suggest getting back to basics. Ask yourself why you want to explore it again. What you want and need in a dominant. Make a list. Stick to your wants and needs. And experiment around some. Maybe just some simple tasks first to dip your toes in again. Or short term dynamics. Online groups on kik and telegram do auctions. Those are short 3-5 day dynamics of sorts that are more a fun simpler type thing.


Either way whatever you choose you can always choose to stop if you don’t like it and go back to domming if you enjoy it more.

 

[An inactive user]

As always greatly spoken @subzzzero

For me I'd say it probably the part where you know what to expect as a dominant and the time it takes to be a good one.

Because you've seen both sides of the medal it's probably harder to start trusting and giving out control.

But I'd definitely say go for short term hookups before going into a relationship and see what your willing to try and test.

Then if it clicks discuss to continue further.