Looking for a strict and controlling dom, online, nonsexual

Sexuality
Straight
Gender
Female
Orientation
Submissive
Region
United States (East of the Rockies)
City
DC
Age
26
Kinks
TPE, control, abuse, punishment, strict rules, CNC, stress positions, bondage, forced compliance, coercive control
Limits
anything anal, public exposure, family and friends, illegal, blood, anything that should go in the toilet, pet play, age play
Experience
Very little; I’ve talked to a few different people but I haven’t found the right kind of person yet

JMegan

Kinky Newbie
  • Straight
  • Female
  • Submissive
Dec 8, 2022
8
4
3
28
Hi all! I’m a 26F, 5’2” 110lbs, blue eyes, brown hair, pale skin.

I’m looking for a non typical type of D/S relationship, I’ll do my best to explain.

First of all, I am asexual, in the sense that actual sexual contact or acts do nothing for me. What gets me sexually aroused is being controlled and forced to comply. So I’m looking for a partner who gets off on being controlling in ways other than sex. Sexual stuff isn’t necessarily a limit, but it needs to be discussed first.

Second, I want an online only relationship. I’m not in the right place in my life to do anything in person. Which is unfortunate, because I really like the idea of being beaten for pissing off my dom and that is just very difficult in an online setting.

Third, let me describe a bit more of what I mean by control. Essentially I want a dom who will give me rules and routines and enforce them strictly. But I want those rules and routines to have a purpose, with that being to help me be the best version of myself. I want someone who will force me to have good behaviors and habits, manage my time well, get things done, and improve myself. Of course, some rules or tasks may be just to please my dom and that’s fine, but I need someone who is prepared to make me do what they want, or else.

Fourth, I feel the need to clarify that I’m not by nature a submissive person, in that I don’t get any satisfaction out of service and my motivation for obeying a dom will not be to make him happy. So I need a partner who gets pleasure not from obedience in itself, but rather from the act of forcing compliance.

Finally, there is definitely a masochistic element to all of this. I want to be punished for messing up or disobeying my dom. I want to know that if I don’t follow orders, it will hurt. But where this is slightly different from your typical masochist is that it’s not exactly pain that gets me off. So I’m not going to be bratty just for a beating. It’s the enforcement of control that gets me off, and if I’m bratty it would be because I don’t feel that sense of control over me enough in that moment so I’m testing the boundaries of what I can get away with before my dom puts me back in my place.



Okay, if you’re still reading, and if you’re interested, message me and let’s talk more!
 
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subzzzero

Kink Talk Guru
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Dominant
Dec 6, 2015
2,133
1,523
233
This is a well written post. Use caution with any potential guys here. Vet them properly and be sure they are what they claim. Lots are on here just horny seeking play and hoping an easy run with a newbie. Check out some posts on here. And to anyone who reaches out to you. Read through all their prior post history here. It will help you see what they are all about. You can do this by tapping/clicking on their name and going to their profile. On the profile is post history.
 

Playfullwolfy

Kink Talk Member
  • Bisexual
  • Male
  • Dominant
Dec 16, 2022
38
13
8
35
Based on your description of personal behaviour the way of control you are looking for will be difficult to implement through online, my personal opinion though
 

subtlizer

Distinguished Member
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Dominant
Aug 23, 2020
258
168
43
28
Can say 100% but to me it seems like, she wants to being used just for the feeling of being used.

Most likely she have a feeling that she is being used because she deserve to be used.

At least to me she gives the feeling of hentai manga I read sometimes like mother-daughter training diaries and like where being a slave is normal, mandatory or sometimes forcefully applied.

Tbh the "obedience" i came in contact with will suit her the best. Everything is fixed, if you do good you get reward. If you don't you get punished, there is no place for sorry or forgiveness. You mess up and you pay for it.

She could be one of the perfect masochists you can find online. If she is not owned. I do prefer to own her.
 

zmoody1

Kink Talk Member
  • Straight
  • Male
  • Private
Aug 28, 2011
37
6
8
May want to checkout getdare as well because its far more active there then here and might have good luck there. Altho as others said it will take time trying to find the right person to meet your search criteria.
 

JMegan

Kinky Newbie
  • Straight
  • Female
  • Submissive
Dec 8, 2022
8
4
3
28
Can say 100% but to me it seems like, she wants to being used just for the feeling of being used.

Most likely she have a feeling that she is being used because she deserve to be used.

At least to me she gives the feeling of hentai manga I read sometimes like mother-daughter training diaries and like where being a slave is normal, mandatory or sometimes forcefully applied.

Tbh the "obedience" i came in contact with will suit her the best. Everything is fixed, if you do good you get reward. If you don't you get punished, there is no place for sorry or forgiveness. You mess up and you pay for it.

She could be one of the perfect masochists you can find online. If she is not owned. I do prefer to own her.
Actually, yes, I think you understand what I’m saying very well. Being forced into slavery, in a context where it’s an accepted part of society, is absolutely a fantasy for me. Still interested? Message me. Also I would love to know where to find the stuff you mentioned reading. Always looking for new content.
 

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