Hello fellow Kink Talkers, I hope you're all doing well.
As I sit here on my velvet throne sipping fine wine while my servants peel my grapes and shell my peanuts I thought I'd share some thoughts I've had recently concerning the site. Specifically there have been a couple of threads discussing aspects that could be improved, or that people are unhappy with.
I am always keen to hear feedback good or bad and try to incorporate changes if they're needed. Of course changes also need to be reasonable and practical as well, the site is built on a standard BBS style framework that limits things to this format.
One such comment was regarding using large banners or landing pages to hit new members with "how to" guides to try and limit bad posting practices. This falls quite simply into the a fore mentioned format framework. It's just something we can't do with the current system. Yes it would be handy in some ways but the next best thing is to provide "stickies" at the head of various forums covering things important in that section. Which is what we do. All it really needs is for people to take a little more time and browse the site for a while before posting, not ideal maybe but it's what we've got.
The second post I wanted to address was regarding banning of new members. This isn't the first time I've received a query about why so many wonderful looking Dommes get banned almost immediately. The answer here is that many, many more that you never see get blocked by various automated parts of our registration system. These are all from known spam and/or scam sites, listed on blacklists and barred from joining before they even finish registration. Unfortunately the bots and other scam sources are always evolving and so new methods that evade the our detection get through. These usually number from 5-10 daily, alert members will often spot a common factor like reused kik or SC ID's, or copy and pasted text. Once reported we remove them, but rest assured, these aren't the droids you're looking for. If they look too good to be true, they usually are. The bottom line here, you're not missing out on anything potentially great, real Dommes are few and far between but they are here. Just take your time and look for the real ones.
Finally I wanted to go back a month of so to a particular post discussing the idea of protecting subs, particularly female subs from fakes and predators. At the time I wasn't free to join the discussion but it ran on several pages of quite intense discussion, several longer term members pointed out the most obvious issues with this idea but I'd like to follow up with some more detail.
Firstly I'd recommend anyone who wasn't around when we explored, trialed and finally axed exposure kink to have a read through some of the discussion that ensued around that. I mention it mostly because it proved just how impossible it is to really control consent in a free and open forum like this. With only a few regular moderators and myself confirming posts and photos as genuine proved far too difficult and onerous. Consequently we had to ban the entire practice to preserve the site from threatened legal action due to ongoing abuses of the system.
The issue with us attempting to verify members for intent, experience and integrity is an even more impossible ask that would again open us to all kinds of legal consequences. What happens if someone we verify commits some sort of offense against another member and they decide to sue us for failing to protect them? Granted that's an extreme case, but then again is it really?
I'd suggest people look up Personal Responsibility, Informed Consensual Kink or PRICK. Better yet read all about safety in my KTU lecture on the subject here.
The clue's in the name though, personal responsibility, just what it says on the tin. There is only so much we can do to protect you, ultimately you need to be responsible for your own safety. Be cautions, be wary and above all don't be in a rush.
Most if not all bad situations occur when people rush into things in their haste for instant gratification. If the dom(me) you've met is any good they will understand when you ask questions, when you take your time, when you want to get to know them before committing to anything.
We do what we can, we volunteer our time for something we are passionate about. We try to protect newbies as much as possible but we're no substitute for your own vigilance and knowledge.
Stay safe, stay sane and keep it consensual.
Be excellent to each other.
As I sit here on my velvet throne sipping fine wine while my servants peel my grapes and shell my peanuts I thought I'd share some thoughts I've had recently concerning the site. Specifically there have been a couple of threads discussing aspects that could be improved, or that people are unhappy with.
I am always keen to hear feedback good or bad and try to incorporate changes if they're needed. Of course changes also need to be reasonable and practical as well, the site is built on a standard BBS style framework that limits things to this format.
One such comment was regarding using large banners or landing pages to hit new members with "how to" guides to try and limit bad posting practices. This falls quite simply into the a fore mentioned format framework. It's just something we can't do with the current system. Yes it would be handy in some ways but the next best thing is to provide "stickies" at the head of various forums covering things important in that section. Which is what we do. All it really needs is for people to take a little more time and browse the site for a while before posting, not ideal maybe but it's what we've got.
The second post I wanted to address was regarding banning of new members. This isn't the first time I've received a query about why so many wonderful looking Dommes get banned almost immediately. The answer here is that many, many more that you never see get blocked by various automated parts of our registration system. These are all from known spam and/or scam sites, listed on blacklists and barred from joining before they even finish registration. Unfortunately the bots and other scam sources are always evolving and so new methods that evade the our detection get through. These usually number from 5-10 daily, alert members will often spot a common factor like reused kik or SC ID's, or copy and pasted text. Once reported we remove them, but rest assured, these aren't the droids you're looking for. If they look too good to be true, they usually are. The bottom line here, you're not missing out on anything potentially great, real Dommes are few and far between but they are here. Just take your time and look for the real ones.
Finally I wanted to go back a month of so to a particular post discussing the idea of protecting subs, particularly female subs from fakes and predators. At the time I wasn't free to join the discussion but it ran on several pages of quite intense discussion, several longer term members pointed out the most obvious issues with this idea but I'd like to follow up with some more detail.
Firstly I'd recommend anyone who wasn't around when we explored, trialed and finally axed exposure kink to have a read through some of the discussion that ensued around that. I mention it mostly because it proved just how impossible it is to really control consent in a free and open forum like this. With only a few regular moderators and myself confirming posts and photos as genuine proved far too difficult and onerous. Consequently we had to ban the entire practice to preserve the site from threatened legal action due to ongoing abuses of the system.
The issue with us attempting to verify members for intent, experience and integrity is an even more impossible ask that would again open us to all kinds of legal consequences. What happens if someone we verify commits some sort of offense against another member and they decide to sue us for failing to protect them? Granted that's an extreme case, but then again is it really?
I'd suggest people look up Personal Responsibility, Informed Consensual Kink or PRICK. Better yet read all about safety in my KTU lecture on the subject here.
The clue's in the name though, personal responsibility, just what it says on the tin. There is only so much we can do to protect you, ultimately you need to be responsible for your own safety. Be cautions, be wary and above all don't be in a rush.
Most if not all bad situations occur when people rush into things in their haste for instant gratification. If the dom(me) you've met is any good they will understand when you ask questions, when you take your time, when you want to get to know them before committing to anything.
We do what we can, we volunteer our time for something we are passionate about. We try to protect newbies as much as possible but we're no substitute for your own vigilance and knowledge.
Stay safe, stay sane and keep it consensual.
Be excellent to each other.
