Switches...Orgasm denial/Control
- Thread starter LossingcontroleSub/Dom
- Start date
Thank you do much for you advice I really appreciate it.
Ps I will definitely talk to him about everything we have discussed. Also before I sign a contract. Thanks again (Big smile)
Just going to put my two cents in takenit for what its worth. For me i can handle over that much control when a Dom has made me feel completely comfortable and safe and in the right head space. If I'm overthink8ng things then I can't get in the right headspace to hand that much control over. And no I'm not saying it's all the doms job to get me in the right headspace but a dom definitely can get you in the right headspace if you let them. You might need more normal clothes on talking before to help get you in the right space. And you can always talk to your Dom about no long periods of denial at first. Tall to them about your hesitancy about it maybe start small till you are more comfortable will more control of it.
Lets approach this issue in a primal way
Since self preservation and reproduction are the main instincts for all sorts of living forms, its really hard to work against them. Hunger, thisrt, pain, pleassure are the main signals of those instincts and are extremely hard to ignore, cause they are not only phisical but also mental and may evolve into a wide range of feelings, like anger or depression, to name a couple.
Handle with care, no1 wants to break their partners mental
Hurting yourself its a really hard task to perform. Same happens with chastity.
Both acts were performed by all kind of religions, like self hurting in order to be fit for forgiveness or withstanding mundane acts like sex dive.
On top of that, orgasms are the rewards for mating, taht is the utmost purpose for every form of life.
Also, if you are used to a regular schedule of orgasms, breaking that schdule its already a hard task to perform, either by not masturbating or having sex or... doing it more frequently.
You should think if it is an addiction, in taht case... submitting to some kind of light orgasm controll could help.. or maybe it jus tmake it worse.
Orgasm control, to my eyes, is one of the top ways of domination / submition.
The absolute goal should be, in a perfect form, something like... tanscending the need of having orgasms and being able to get them whenever its needed without being frustrated, addicted, uneasy and all the feelings that comes when you are fighting such a strong instinct.
Of course, as people suggested its a matter of trying, small stepts, and finding some1 you want to submit.
About contracts... well... im kind of like but not like them. As a personal way of thinking, i take them as a guideline, more than obligations. Just like the Pirates code LOL.
In a strict way of dealing with contracts, u can agree at first then add moddiffications to it so its a benefit for both parts
CONTRACTS CAN BE BROKEN AND MODDIFIED. They should be broken or moddifIed if one of the parts (the one giving power, usually) is not ok with it. Be sure to add the lines u need to in order to make it easier for you, like small trials or so.
About trying orgasm control, its just like gettng better at sports or some kind of new thing. I whoudlnt say "dont force yourself" since its an endurance tasks. In order to endure.. u need to force yourself and "suffer"
BUT, with endurance may come reward, you put a lot of effort and u wont be payed for them in short, benefits from sports will come with time. Also.. you mabe practice boxing (IMO one of the most demanding sports) until you become "good" at it... and then realize boxing is not for you..so its time to move to another thing.
wow... to loong... hope i make sense.
Since self preservation and reproduction are the main instincts for all sorts of living forms, its really hard to work against them. Hunger, thisrt, pain, pleassure are the main signals of those instincts and are extremely hard to ignore, cause they are not only phisical but also mental and may evolve into a wide range of feelings, like anger or depression, to name a couple.
Handle with care, no1 wants to break their partners mental
Hurting yourself its a really hard task to perform. Same happens with chastity.
Both acts were performed by all kind of religions, like self hurting in order to be fit for forgiveness or withstanding mundane acts like sex dive.
On top of that, orgasms are the rewards for mating, taht is the utmost purpose for every form of life.
Also, if you are used to a regular schedule of orgasms, breaking that schdule its already a hard task to perform, either by not masturbating or having sex or... doing it more frequently.
You should think if it is an addiction, in taht case... submitting to some kind of light orgasm controll could help.. or maybe it jus tmake it worse.
Orgasm control, to my eyes, is one of the top ways of domination / submition.
The absolute goal should be, in a perfect form, something like... tanscending the need of having orgasms and being able to get them whenever its needed without being frustrated, addicted, uneasy and all the feelings that comes when you are fighting such a strong instinct.
Of course, as people suggested its a matter of trying, small stepts, and finding some1 you want to submit.
About contracts... well... im kind of like but not like them. As a personal way of thinking, i take them as a guideline, more than obligations. Just like the Pirates code LOL.
In a strict way of dealing with contracts, u can agree at first then add moddiffications to it so its a benefit for both parts
CONTRACTS CAN BE BROKEN AND MODDIFIED. They should be broken or moddifIed if one of the parts (the one giving power, usually) is not ok with it. Be sure to add the lines u need to in order to make it easier for you, like small trials or so.
About trying orgasm control, its just like gettng better at sports or some kind of new thing. I whoudlnt say "dont force yourself" since its an endurance tasks. In order to endure.. u need to force yourself and "suffer"
BUT, with endurance may come reward, you put a lot of effort and u wont be payed for them in short, benefits from sports will come with time. Also.. you mabe practice boxing (IMO one of the most demanding sports) until you become "good" at it... and then realize boxing is not for you..so its time to move to another thing.
wow... to loong... hope i make sense.
Thank you for your reply Gengis , always informative and eazy to understand...
I do believe it's something Primal in me that doesn't like to have orgasm taken away from me. Plus in a bit of a spoiled brat...and like to have my own way. That's why this is a challenge for...ha ha ha
I was brought up in a religious setting and as a child I believed every was told...Alas as one get older and see more if the world. One makes up ones own mind about these things.
I will not give up on orgasm control not just for myself, but for my kink relationship....
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